Wednesday, December 24, 2008

xmas eve update

Ok, so, so far, so good.

I was slow to initiate, but that's always been an issue. Pretty awkward for a while there. Then it was good once the ice was broken. A little late, but actually still quite satisfying. She said something like; "I wouldn't have thought you'd be like, cuddly and stuff" I said, "Me either". She said, "What do you mean, you're not normally like this?" and I said "Normally, I'm alone".

We watched a bunch of cartoons and hung out all night and the next day until like 6pm. She's gone to do the family thing right now, but I may see her again tomorrow or on the 26th, before she head's back. I feel a little weird now, sort of exposed. I'm not sure if she enjoyed herself. She seemed to though, we made out this morning for a bit, light physical contact later.

I found myself talking about things I normally try to keep to myself. Family drug use, health, beliefs, the future, that sorta jazz. I don't know now how much of what I said was of substance. I hope I didn't talk too crazy. But we laughed a lot, good fun. She's pretty cool.

We didn't end up with the liquor we had intended, so we had to get creative with what was available. Imaginably, that lead to some upset stomachs. Energy drinks might not have been a great idea either. I needed to buy things to cash a check, but still, I could have got more cigarettes or something. So we were both pretty nervous, we're kind of nervous people, but the tension was fun, and then the newness was fun. Fuck it was hard to get over that hump though. A rush once you do though. Been a while.

I'm wondering now about my breath, we're my teeth clean enough, was I too sweaty, is there something I should be working on? Maybe I'll ask her about it.

Christmas tomorrow, that's fun. Got some gifts coming I don't know about, should be some good stuff. Pretty tired now, didn't sleep too well. Again; didn't mind. Will update in the future. Happy holidays.

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