How dark is your shadow?

I go from incredible alarm
to totally relaxed.
I sedate myself to ignore the looming cloud of oppression
so many control mechanisms work to keep me in line
keep me doubting myself
don't strike out on your own, you'll never make it
well maybe i will, and maybe i won't
there's only one way to find out

fuck you big brother, you can't keep me from the truth
i know it hurts, but you think living a lie is easy?
fake it 'till you feel it, what if I never do?
live life as a fake?
what if 'feeling it' is become desensatized to the self-loathing?
like a constant pain that eventually fades into the background.
hating yourself is part of life? I think not.

sin, what is sin.
a crime against life?
even murder can be justified in self-defense
so what actions are truly inexcusable?
if we are all one mind, would we not all have done the same as the accused?
the rapist, the murderer, the thief, the liar.
the madman

How dark is your shadow?